Feeling the Glow Again

[just wrote a lot in my journal for the first time in quite a while and I would like to reiterate some (or all) of that here. it's messy but it's honest.]

I’m finally feeling that fire again. The passion in my heart that has motivated me to do things I never ever ever thought I could do. Lately I’ve been feeling frustrated, exhausted, and dissatisfied. I’m working for a corporation and about to be in $2,000 of debt (which is absolutely laughable compared to a lot of people my age – I should not be worried). So I’ve been in this “trapped” feeling, like I’m here and I have to be here and I’m not happy about it, but what can I do?

but it doesn’t have to feel that way. because I can still own my life while working for someone else. I can still play by my rules. and so what if I’m in a little bit of debt? it’s only temporary, I just need to keep rolling and building cashflow. 

it is spring again and I am so ready to bloom into myself, to be all me and to love who I am wholely and completely.


I want to get back into blogging, to writing my heart out on paper and on keys, to photographing the beauty that surrounds me, to exploring and loving all that life has to offer.

I’m ready to own my mornings, my evenings, my weekends. ready to wake up early with the sun, with that fire glowing in my heart, and carry that full, elated passion through my day.

you don’t have to be a slave to a system you don’t love. you can do whatever you want, you just have to be strong.

Japan Day One

I made it! My first day in Japan was a loooong one. I arrived late at night on Monday (around 5am back home). Sachie’s mom and younger sister, Naomi and Akari, picked me up at the bus station.

On Tuesday, I went with Naomi to her work. it’s a place called しあわせの村 (Shiawase no Mura – happiness village). It’s a beautiful place with lots of outdoor activity space, a gym, pool, spa, gardens, playground and lots more.

“Shiawase-no-mura is a comprehensive welfare complex equipped with a variety of integrated facilities designed to support independent living for the disabled and the elderly, and their participation in society, while also serving as a meeting place for all Kobe citizens to deepen mutual understanding and work together to create a society in which everyone can lead a full life.”


Shiawase no Mura Japanese Garden


twelve days.

The closer it comes, the more surreal it feels. in twelve days I will board a plane, fly over the Pacific Ocean, and land in Japan. I will travel outside of the United States for the first time in my life (besides that one trip to Vancouver). for nine weeks I will reside in a whole new land!

But when I mention my trip, people always ask: “what will you DO in Japan for two whole months?!”

The plain answer is: I will be living my dream. I will be exploring new places, meeting new people, and learning about new ideas.

For the first week, I will be visiting my best friend and her family down in the islands. it will be typhoon season, but I hope that the sky gods will bless me with good fortune and I will not be drenched in rain the entire time.

Then for a couple 10-day periods I will be volunteering at organic farms through WWOOF Japan. This is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, and I hope to do it elsewhere around the world in the future!

Between my farming trips and island excursion, I will be staying with my friend Sachie whom I met earlier this year. She was an exchange student at my college and is a really great friend! Her mother offered for me to stay with them during my trip and I am SO INCREDIBLY grateful. without their help, I might not have been able to make this trip happen.

While I’m in Japan, I don’t really want to do the typical touristy things. I want to explore the real-life down-to-earth Japanese culture. I plan to:
1. meet people
2. talk to people
3. photograph these people and their work / places / activities
4. share my findings on this blog (and make a book????)

I consider this the study abroad trip that I never got to do in college. now I get to do it on my own terms (…and my own wallet).

Also, I will be celebrating my 25th (my Golden Birthday) in Japan!! I am super excited and look forward to sharing my adventure with everyone :)